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A husband is not a solution: Encouragement for pursuing your goals when single

Let's Talk Singleness

February 3, 2020

“If I just had a husband, this would be so much easier.”


That’s what I used to think when it came to any of my life goals that required something from me that didn’t come naturally, or that just didn’t seem readily available. Skills I need to own a business, companions to travel with, money to fund an idea.

My default in those moments was to ruminate on the belief that if I just had a husband, he could surely help me with some of this.

Figure it out, have the solution, or even, be the solution.

And honestly, to some extent, that thought wasn’t unfounded. There are some things I don’t doubt will get easier with a partner, but in order to keep moving forward in the here and now? This is what I’ve had to realize:


Believing that the barrier to my goals is not having a husband, only fuels the false narrative that my singleness is a problem, and everything will magically be better when I’m married.


Because the honest truth is? We aren’t guaranteed to marry someone who knows how to do or even wants to do ANY of the things we feel are in our way right now. The guy could be amazing in a million other ways, but be totally lacking in the reasons we’ve been delaying our goals.

A husband is not a solution, and we cannot let not having one become our excuse not to move.

So what to do instead? Hop outside the box! Instead of ruminating on a belief that keeps you stuck, flex those creative muscles.

How could you go about your plans differently?

How could you leverage your existing resources?

What are some new ways you could find the people you need?

After all, even if this guy who loves to travel, can do taxes, has a law degree, is handy around the house, can build a website, change a tire, and is aligned to every whim or idea that we have exists (by the way, if you know this guy send him my way), he’s not here yet, and we can’t hang around stuck until he is.

We got a whole lotta livin’ to do ladies, so let’s get to it! ♥️

A Husband Is Not a Solution: Encouragement for Pursuing Your Goals When Single | Singleness Quotes | Singleness Advice | Pursue Your Dreams | Think Outside the Box | Finding Solutions |

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

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