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What would I do if I knew I would never get married?: A single girl’s reflection on waiting

Let's Talk Singleness

December 15, 2018

I was chatting with a friend recently and she mentioned she’s started asking herself, “What would I do if I knew I would never get married?”


What dreams would she pursue? Where would she go? How would her choices be different if she weren’t waiting for her relationship status to change?

I thought, how often are we as single women guilty of making our life choices based on a man who hasn’t shown up yet?


We so often wonder if we will ever get married, not just because it’s a hope in our hearts, but because we would make different choices if we knew.


And until we know the answer for certain, we let our wondering and our waiting trump all else.

We worry that taking a chance or changing our course will put finding our guy at risk, and that we are better off to just stay put. We worry that we will make memories without a significant other, and that there won't be any memories left to be made when we do find someone. We are willing to put off our dreams or never pursue them at all waiting for just one dream to come true.


But a relationship does not define us.


Our relationship status is not all that we are, and getting married is not the ultimate task we are put on this earth to do.

What adventures could we be missing if we keep waiting? What magical, awe inspiring moments will we never see? Will we just let our goals and passions fall by the wayside?


So I ask you, if you knew you would never get married, what would you do?


Better yet, whether you get married or not, what do you want to do?

Where do you feel called?

I encourage you today, whatever the answer to that question, go and do. Go and live this life TODAY.

"What would I do if I knew I would never get married?: A single girl's reflection on waiting| Waiting for the one | Singleness Advice | Don't Wait | Live Life |

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  1. Dixie Burge says:

    I never wondered what I would do if I knew I would never get married. There was never an “if” involved, because I KNEW from a very young age that I would never marry. I’m talking about age 10 or 11. That’s how early I knew. I didn’t know how I knew, I just knew. I was more certain about it than I ever was about anything else. You could hang your hat on it. THAT’S how certain I was. And I was always a pretty wishy-washy person, wondering what to do next about so many things, uncertain about the future. So it was always the greatest mystery of my life, how I knew. In fact, it was the only thing I was ever certain of in my entire life. I am now going on 70 years old, and guess what? I’m still single, never married, just like I always KNEW it would be. My biggest question was always, “How did I know?”

    I fill my life with plans for traveling to all the places I have dreamed about. And road trips! How I love to drive! Right by myself. So life is never dull, never unfulfilling. There is always a new adventure around every corner, IF you choose to look for them. I don’t let the grass grow under my feet!

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